Thursday, February 16, 2012

Love at First Sight (from Turn Left Turn Right)

Just love this movie and Takeshi Kaneshiro…
 

Love at First Sight
Wislawa Szymborska
Both are convinced
that a sudden surge of emotion bound them together.
Beautiful is such a certainty,
but uncertainty is more beautiful.

Because they didn't know each other earlier, they suppose that
nothing was happening between them.
What of the streets, stairways and corridors
where they could have passed each other long ago?

I'd like to ask them
whether they remember-- perhaps in a revolving door
ever being face to face?
an "excuse me" in a crowd
or a voice "wrong number" in the receiver.
But I know their answer:
no, they don't remember.

They'd be greatly astonished
to learn that for a long time
chance had been playing with them.

Not yet wholly ready
to transform into fate for them
it approached them, then backed off,
stood in their way
and, suppressing a giggle,
jumped to the side.
There were signs, signals:
but what of it if they were illegible.
Perhaps three years ago,
or last Tuesday
did a certain leaflet fly
from shoulder to shoulder?
There was something lost and picked up.
Who knows but what it was a ball
in the bushes of childhood.

There were doorknobs and bells
on which earlier
touch piled on touch.
Bags beside each other in the luggage room.
Perhaps they had the same dream on a certain night,
suddenly erased after waking.

Every beginning
is but a continuation,
and the book of events
is never more than half open.

-translated by Walter Whipple




Monday, February 13, 2012

Old Poems


‘Indi Tanan nga Tamawo Nagapuyo sa Talon
10 August 1996 Indi Tanan nga Tamawo Nagaistar sa Talon
(revised 26 April 2005)

“Paning!
Uli run! Hinugay panughot-sughot sa talon
Ikabuol ‘kaw gani ka tamawo
Maan kanimo.”
“Insa, ‘Nay haw?”
“Ay! Waay ‘kaw kamaan?
Ang mga ginatago ka tamawo
Indi run gawa kauli
Pirahan pa ka adlaw, semana, bulan
Kun kaisa gani ginatuigan.”
“Ti, ‘Nay, kun amo
Si Tatay ginataratago man ka tamawo?
Laka lang mag-uli giya kanaton
Garing, daw waay man tana gapatalon.”
“Hay, Paning
Sa amo ka d’ya nga panahon
Indi tanan nga tamawo nagapuyo sa talon.”


Nadumduman ko si Juan Pusong
(Para Kay Tatay)
17 January 1998
(revised 26April2005)

Nadumduman ko si Juan Pusong
Ang ana pagpasimpalad
Imo ginpaunlan kanakon
Indi ko malipatan
Ang kabuhi ni Sandapal
Nga akon  gintandayan
Sa ramig kang gabii…

Katingalahan
Pay waay matak-an ang akon talinga
Sa pagpamati
Sa liwat-liwat nga istorya
Kang amaranhig
Nga nagapakalot ka anang likod
Kang tawo
Nga ginahukas-hukas ang ana pa-a
Kag mga mantiyaw
Nga nagapatupong sa puno ka doldol…

Tatay,
                        Ang imo limug
ang akon habol
                        Sa pagturog.

Just Dark

I just love traveling at night because I get to see darkness in different dimensions...different hues and depths..
It's like watching the reverse of a silent movie -- just the blank screen shot with only the musical score, unscripted dialogues and a myriad of sounds and impressions. John Keats once wrote "heard melodies are sweet, but those unheard are sweeter." Therefore, if there is beauty in the world that we see, then there is so much more in the unseen world... perhaps, it is why we close our eyes
Darkness is a malong of exotic batik design that is constantly changing its shape and form according to one's perceptions, dreams and fears...
I just love the dark..staring into its heart is like staring into the night's irises...and they strain my eyes less.

Thursday, February 9, 2012

Those who love you...


For He makes His sun rise on the bad and the good, and causes rain to fall on the just and the unjust. For if you love those who love you, what recompense will you have? - Matthew 5:45-46



There are just some people we can easily live without. The bully in school. That jerk who dump us for somebody with more.. The know-it-all who likes to stir things up and make our life a little uncomfortable. We surely are better off without them. Why didn't God make people who are alike in disposition? After all, "birds of the same feather… "

We tend to love those who love us. We  give them our love because we know that it will be returned. It is easier that way. No fear of rejection. No pining away of the unrequited. No challenge, either. However, God calls on us to be unconditional. "For He makes His sun rise on the bad and the good, and.. rain..  on the just and the unjust." (Mat. 5:45)

Nobody is above anybody. Or below anybody else for that matter.  We are all created equal. We're in this world together. So we must love one another. 

But this is sooo hard. How could Little Red Riding Hood love the Big Bad Wolf? How can Lex Luther love Superman? Or Harry Oslo forgive Spiderman?  How can you love somebody who just get in your nerves just by the mere sight of them?

We may think that without these "irritants", this world will be a much better place.  But God has other plans. He created the world not just for a privileged few, but for all. The good, the bad, and the ugly. They too fit in His grand design, no matter how unfit they are in our mortal eyes.  He put these people there for a reason. These people are in our lives perhaps  to teach us more about ourselves… human nature…  this world… but especially God's graciousness, His great mercy, and God's eternal love… He plants them in our lives so we may grow in His love.

Like the lyrics in the song, "We all live under the same sun. We all live under the same moon. They why, why, why couldn't we live as one?"

Love is unconditional. If we cannot find it in our hearts to love our personal "irritants", don't you think it's about time that we 911 God? To be able to love unconditionally takes more than our feeble human efforts. We need to have God on our side.

Going the extra mile



Should anyone press you into service for one mile, go with him for two miles. -Matthew 6:41 



I am reading Stephenie Meyer's Twilight  and came across this line "Just because we've been… dealt a certain hand… it doesn't mean that we can't choose to rise above — to conquer the boundaries of a destiny that none of us wanted."



Edward Cullen's effort in fighting his very nature, because he doesn't want to be the monster that he is, for me reflects that "going the extra mile". More than that actually, he chose a different path. Sure, it took him more than his superpowers would allow him to accomplish this task. He did it anyway. Perhaps out of love… or out of his family's belief in goodness. It is also the price he has to pay for being a vampire with a conscience.



I'm no Edward Cullen… of course, I would love to have his superpowers.



When I was a Gurong Pahinungod volunteer, I also felt like a superhuman. I was given  the opportunity to "go the extra mile" in the name of service. Not because I was told to. Nor I have such an overwhelming love for the people of my assignment… I don't exactly know why I did it. Perhaps because I was there. God put me there. So I did what I could. Who am I to question God's will?



There are things that volunteers have to do in their areas of deployment and there are some things that are expected of them. That is why, "nothing comes stronger that the heart of a volunteer". Ehem



We were deployed as teachers and we are just there to teach and take on a community project. Somehow we managed to do more than that… we touched their lives. But not as much as they touched ours, I say.



When we go out of our way to help others -- family, friends, or people we just meet, it is also a way of going that extra mile that God asked us to. It doesn't have to be a big task. Small things really count.



When was the last time I went the extra mile for somebody?

A leaf from my journal


Tuesday, June 16, 2009

“To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering, one must not love. But then, one suffers from not loving. Therefore, to love is to suffer; not to love is to suffer; to suffer is to suffer. To be happy is to love. To be happy, then, is to suffer, but suffering makes one unhappy. Therefore, to be happy, one must love or love to suffer or suffer from too much happiness.” - Woody Allen


It's another rainy Tuesday morning… it doesn't make any difference to me though. I'm staying indoors again today. The number of my winged friends that come to die in my bed is significantly reduced. Thanks to the weather, I guess.

I had a wonderful time yesterday cracking my brains for writing again. It took the whole day to accomplish such. It's like I'm working again. I'm down on my last 100 pages of Twilight. It's interesting, indeed. Very easy to read. The love between Bella and Edward is overwhelmingly cheesy. Falling in love with your own food… what could be more tragic than that? Or creepier? Yes, we are discouraged from playing with our food, but we are never told not to obsessed over them. I shudder to think about special diets. But at least the love story of Bella and Edward has a happy-forever-after ending… I skimmed through the later books, hehehe.

I can somehow understand why this particular vampire story is appealing to readers. Edward Cullen is the best "noble savage"… a monster with a heart. And Bella Swan is the perfect martyr. What could be more beautiful than giving up everything just to be with your love? She is literally worshiping the ground he walked on… who could blame her, he is a perfect predator. He is naturally attractive to his prey. Such unconditional love is what most people long for from a lover.

A lot could be learn from their restraint. Indeed, to love is to suffer.

Ahh… all these stuff about love. I'm done watching Butterfly Lovers and Cyborg Girl. I love them! And the sacrifices they do in the name of love.

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Old Poems: on "kahidlaw" (longing/yearning)

Kamingaw
8 June 1997 Kahidlaw
(revised 26 April 2005)

Ginbalon ko ang karantahon ka maya
nga nagasalang
ka anang pugad
sa sangka sanga ka talisay
sa may sapa
sa likod balay namon
agudto may inugbulong ako
sa akon kamingaw.

Ugaring
waay man ako nag-ayad
sa kanta ka maya

Hay nalipatan ko abi bitbiton
ang anang pugad
ang sanga
ang puno ka talisay
ang sapa
ka gang amon balay.



Dabuk
30 June 2000
(revised 26 April 2005)

Ginsilhig ko
ang imo pangako
kanakon
imaw sa mga laya nga dahon
sa amon ugsaran.

Sanda akon tipunon
sa sangka tumpok
kag tutudan
agudto ang aso
masamo sa hangin
kag ana isulat
sa panganod
nga giya lang ako
nagahulat kanimo.



Indi Run Ako Pagpadaha-a Kang Kamingaw
13 July 2000 Indi run Ako Pagdaha-i kang Kamingaw
(revised 26 April 2005)
                     
Indi run ako pagpadaha-a kang kamingaw
hay amo d’ya ang akon ginalakot sa kalo-kalo
kun ako mamahaw nga waay ikaw.

Kamingaw man ang ginadapli ko kun ugto
ang akon ginasubak sa tugabang ukon alugbate
nga aton kauna ginalaswa
kag saro naton ginahigop ang sabaw.

Pay kun gab-i
nga ako d’lang tulad mag-ayapon
masapnot gid sa tutunlan
ang maghanggop kang kamingaw
bisan ano pa kaduro kag kanamit ang panakut
bisan ano pa katam-is ang panghinunga…

Hay ang akon padalundon
luha man sa gihapon.